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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29071314">First Time</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/div2994/pseuds/div2994'>div2994</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Maul x Reader Inserts [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Darth Maul Needs a Hug, Eventual Fluff, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Maul is soft and so are you, Miscommunication, Mutual Pining, Other, gender neutral reader, reference to sex offscreen</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 09:34:27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,334</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29071314</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/div2994/pseuds/div2994</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Maul has never heard "I love you".  Well, there's a first time for everything.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Darth Maul/Reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Maul x Reader Inserts [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2132880</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>41</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>First Time</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Angsty at the start, fluffy at the end, don't worry reader, I got you<br/>Deep in my Maul feelings tonight</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The first time you tell Maul you love him, it slips out and you want the ground to swallow you up.</p><p>“I’m leaving.” You regret breaking the previously comfortable silence as he barely looks up from his datapad, nodding softly.</p><p>You stand abruptly, surprised he has nothing more to say.</p><p>“Really?  That’s it, no asking why or where I’m going?” Your voice is threatening to break, stars, don’t break in front of him.</p><p>“Why would I?  You don’t need my permission,” he says with a slight tone of annoyance, brows furrowed as he tries to concentrate on the current uprising in the syndicate.</p><p>“Right.  Okay.  Guess I’ll see you around then.”  You turn to leave, tears pricking your eyes.</p><p>You can’t believe he’s being so cavalier, not that you imagine he feels the same way about you but you had hoped-</p><p>“And what is that supposed to mean?” He pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs. “I have neither the time nor patience for dramatics, if you want me to follow you-"</p><p>“That’s the thing, I don’t, I can’t-"</p><p>“Can’t what?” His anger is building now, something is wrong but one of you is being obtuse and he can’t tell which.</p><p>“I can’t stay!” You’re trembling, wanting so badly to stay, to stay with him, but pining for a Sith Lord is hard work. “I can’t stay here, I’m taking my ship and leaving Mandalore, Maul, I’m sorry.”</p><p>His hearts drop to the pit of his stomach, suddenly a black expanse through which they keep falling- how could you leave?  He really thought maybe this once... no, everyone leaves in the end, it was only a matter of time.</p><p>He’s on his feet without a thought, nails biting into his palm to keep himself grounded.  His lips draw back in a snarl, an expression you’d seen countless times but never directed at you.  Your chest aches and your palms sweat  but you stand your ground.</p><p>“Then leave, I’d hate to think I were keeping you here against your will, you must have so many pressing appointments.” Sorrow has quickly turned to rage and he needs you to leave before he does something he’ll regret.</p><p>“You know that’s not the case, don’t be so kriffing cruel.  Force, if I’d realised how you truly felt sooner I’d have left sooner, I do apologise, my Lord.” Your words come out harsher than you mean them, laced with spite in retaliation.</p><p>“Cruel?  You haven’t seen cruel, get out before that changes.” He’s shaking too now, desperately trying to control every urge to scream and rage until you’ve gone.  Abandoned again, no, he is fear, he is hunter, he is nothing.</p><p>You can feel his rage rolling off him in waves as he paces the hall, looking anywhere but at you.  Why would he care so much?  You’ve never truly known what goes on his head, but you assumed he was fairly indifferent towards you.  Yes, he tolerates your presence more than the others in court, allowed you to get a little closer than most too, the only one he would ever request to join him aside from his brother.  And it wasn’t as if you hadn’t shared his bed a few times, but you had assumed that was boredom, a way to pass the time for both of you.  He wasn’t the type to get attached and you knew that, fought your own feelings, there was no way they would ever be returned.  Unless-</p><p>“I can’t believe I loved you.” You’re taking a chance, gambling on the possibility that his anger has something more to it, force, please have something more to it, this was such a risky move.</p><p>He stops his pacing, still refusing to even glance at you, but his black towering rage becomes slightly less black.  Very, very, dark grey.</p><p>“What did you say?” Is that hope you detect?</p><p>You clench your jaw a little and reply, “I loved you.  It was foolish, I see that now.”</p><p>He starts to pace again, less in a temper though, more out of the confusion written all over his face.  It couldn’t be.  And even if it were, you said loved, past tense.  Cue the longest, most tense silence you’d ever experienced, during which all you could do was stand there nervous, so nervous, nausea building as you watch him pace back and forth, wringing your hands a little.</p><p>“Maul, please say something, anything,” you hate pleading like this but he won’t be the one to break the silence, having to admit everything he’s thinking, feeling, terrified that you really will leave when he says the wrong thing.</p><p>He seems to choose his words carefully, still not looking at you, refusing to look because if he looks he’ll break.</p><p>“You said... loved.  You... loved me.  Why did you say nothing?” It comes out as a whisper, almost as if to himself.</p><p>“How could I?  We’re... friends, aren’t we?  At least you have me around when you don’t really need me-"</p><p>“I do need you.” He’s louder this time but not by much, you’re not even sure you heard him right.</p><p>“What?” You need him to say it again, need to hear it a thousand times more.</p><p>He turns and finally looks into your eyes, expression softening instantly when he sees the tears rolling down your cheeks.  He wants to brush them away, to hold your face and tell you he wants you by his side, that you can’t leave him, to make you promise to never leave.</p><p>“I need you.  And if you no longer feel the same, I understand.”  He can’t hold your gaze, he tries but a heat rises in him that any other being would identify as embarrassment.</p><p>Your eyebrows crease in astonishment, a smile working its way to your lips, threatening to crack your face in half.  Need.  Need would do.</p><p>“I’d follow you to the ends of the galaxy if you asked me to.”</p><p>His hearts skip a beat or three as you speak, a pressure building in his chest that feels so warm, so kriffing pure, he’s never felt anything like it.</p><p>“I love you, and I’ll keep loving you, and if you have to hear it again and again, I’ll keep telling you, until you’re sick of hearing it, until you beg me to stop.”</p><p>“Go on then,” he says, his features so soft your heart melts. “Tell me again.”</p><p>“I love you,” you huff a laugh, small and quietly ecstatic, “I love you, I love you, I love you.” Placing emphasis on every single word, huffing a laugh as you do so, enjoying seeing him melt at your words.  Bringing a Lord of the Sith, former as he would so often remind you, to his knees could soon become a much beloved pastime, judging by the warmth that envelops you every single time you tell him how you feel.</p><p>He’s scarcely able to believe it, even after hearing it from your lips so many times, that he might no longer be nothing, that he might actually be something to someone like you.  He whispers your name in reverence, like a prayer that keeps you spellbound and breathless.</p><p>You reach out for him, hand on his chest while the other searches for his hand to hold, to reassure him that it’s okay.  He holds onto you like you’ll disappear, dissolve through his fingers into the ether, and you pull him closer and sigh into his chest.  He lifts your face with a finger and actually smiles.  You’ve only seen him smile a handful of times and it’s not always because he’s happy, not that he knows what happy means.  It’s warm and genuine and content, you’ve never seen such a sight and it reignites the ache in your chest, that you’re sure can only be quelled by one thing.</p><p>When his mouth claims yours, everything burns, warm and bright and glowing, an unmistakable feeling that, well, it feels like home.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Ugh I love a soft Maul, anyway thank you for reading, hit me up at dinsbeskar on tumblr, I need more Maul stan friends 😅</p></blockquote></div></div>
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